Camel Toad Productions » Uncategorized http://www.cameltoadproductions.com "Rejoice, or have joy thrust upon you" Fri, 06 Jan 2012 15:56:09 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.1 It begins… again. As it tend’s to do… http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/07/05/it-begins-again-as-it-tends-to-do/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/07/05/it-begins-again-as-it-tends-to-do/#comments Wed, 06 Jul 2011 06:32:30 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1391 Good evening my fellow Americans… and people from- I don’t know… Sweden?

It’s been a minute. Unless you follow me on twitter (And I mean, who doesn’t? Looking at you, Kutcher!) and then it’s literally been a minute.

Hi. How are you? The kids? Oh. Oh-… Ok. Stop now. It’s called pleasantries. Dick.

What bring’s me here tonight, you may be asking (do it- It feel’s amazing).  It’s been a fairly hectic… year; in a good way of course- but, having been behind the proverbial trenches so much I have lost the thread a bit when it comes to updating my websites. This shall not abide. I shall not abide this! Something about abiding! (I’m tired).

With all this said, and the relaunching of my life (which has had more reboots then Michael Myers) I though’t I’d give you all some brief updates into the state of all things Camel Toad.

Bullet Listed- Cause who has time anymore, am I right? I am.

  • BAGGED & BOARDED: The Flagship show. The Towncar, to my Lincoln. The watermelon-kiwi Skittle to my Tropical flavor blended skittles. The biggun. Where’s it been? Oh, how bout gearing up to greet the world via the nation’s most esteemed comic book shop: Golden Apple Comics! That’s right- with the closure of our beloved SmodCastle, Bagged & Boarded is moving the live recordings to Golden Apple Comics on Melrose Ave in the heart of Hollywood! Things kick off on Wednesday, July 6th at 8pm with renowned voice-over artist, comedian and Marvin, Mr. Phil Lamarr! Tickets to B&B @GappleComics will be FREE for all! Save your money for important things… like insulin. Of course, other then the live recordings I will be presenting episodes of the Brave and the Bold: Old School comedy podcasting with some of the funniest and only friends I have. All this courtesy of Golden Apple and the fine- nay; stellar folks at the SmodCast Network and SModCast Internet Radio. Ton’s of great guests lined up, plenty of Brave and Bold convo’s to be had, new merch on the way, special “road” shows-… Lot’s going on folks. Keep up. This will all be on the test.

 

  • MOHR STORIES: In which i take off my podcasting hat and put on my podcasting hat- with the producer brim. I am proud to be the producer/engineer for the hilarious Jay Mohr’s (SNL, Jerry Maquire, Last Comic Standing) new weekly SmodCast Network podcast, MOHR STORIES . Each week Jay and a funny friend/comedian chat about some of the craziest and never before heard stories from the depths of the Comedy world. While I am not a “vocal” (but kinda am- you’ll see) part of the show, this is my new gig- and therefore will receive my full attention and abilities. What I’m trying to say is- you know I take pride in my podcasts. Add in the insanely funny Jay Mohr and his equally funny pals- Must hear, podcast gold. Coming soon

 

  • UPCOMING CAMELTOAD/TOO MANY HATS WEB SERIES: This one is exciting. Not that all my other projects aren’t but-…. this one is going to be something special. Without giving out too many (or virtually ANY details), my good friend and comedic actor extraordinare  Mike Hatton (Shoot The Hero, Seriously Funny Kids) approached me with a concept for a webseries and less then two weeks later… We’re off to the races folks. We’ve got our location, our crew- and some VERY exciting casting announcements (which I’ll be making in the next few weeks, but suffice it to say- It’s gonna be like Bagged & Boarded all-stars up in this piece. The screen will be filled with some impressive and infamous folks. We lucked the FUCK out). I will be writing the series with Mike, acting in it and editing the piece (as well as AD’ing- cause I’m a screamer).  Hopefully as things come together I can let you folks know a bit more of what’s coming your way but until then…. Webseries. Strip Club. Hilarious. Chew on that…

 

  • CAMEL TOAD COMICS: I have alot of movie ideas. At current time date… 73 on the big board. So… that’ll never happen. But rather then allow these concepts to go un-tapped, I have begun to “translate” some of my screenplays into the comic book format, and with the help of some incredibly talented friends I have in the industry, have also begun the process of turning them into real life, honest to goodness, paper product Comic Books! (in 3D even!). This obviously won’t be an “over night” project but sometime before the year is out, I hope to have the first issue (or first few) of a Camel Toad Comic on shelves (and virtual shelves) near you.

 

  • MATT COHEN; STAND-UP COMEDIAN: I’ve had my hand into most aspects of the comedy “biz”- Improv, sketch writing, feature films, television, podcasting, etc- The one thing I have yet to try out is stand-up comedy. And luckily, I’m in the right town for that (and know the right people). I probably won’t announce anything for quite some time, but in the next few month’s I’ll be starting to get up on stages around town and developing a stand-up routine. I’ll update folks once I feel “comfortable” enough to share my particular stand-up syltings. But I’m excited to try it out. And, also because if I stop working for even one minute I have to stare at the darkness that is myself (and it burns, father… how it burns).

 

  • CAMEL TOAD PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS: Don’t for a second think because I’m suddenly busy I will stop making an ass out of myself on the internet. Cause I won’t… Unless you really want me to. No! Stay strong, Matt! What was originally envision as a stage show is now becoming a series of online comedy sketches, written and directed by myself and starring an eclectic group of comedy compadres. These won’t be “as” frequent with all the other weekly gigs going on, but I aim to shoot one every month or so- and start to develop a nice little back catalogue of sketches and what not. Sketch comedy (watching it, at least) changed my life, and I will ALWAYS think in terms of sketches. Here’s my chance to get a few out to the world. Sexy.

 

  • PARTY RENTALS: I do Bar-Mitzvhas, Weddings and Quinceneras (you must provide the lavender Tuxedo)

Thar be the plan, childrens. Yes, I’m stacking my plates pretty high this year but I smoke alot of pot and have poor motor skills, so I have a tendency to drop plates. Keep your old occulars peeled to this space and twitter for more updates as they come .

2011 is the year of the Camel Toad. And if it isn’t, lie to me… I’m fragile like a breakfast pastry.

-Matt Cohen 7/5/2011 Playboy Mansion, Underneath the Grotto.

 

 

]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/07/05/it-begins-again-as-it-tends-to-do/feed/ 2 Geek of the Day: Forrie http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/14/geek-of-the-day-forrie/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/14/geek-of-the-day-forrie/#comments Thu, 14 Apr 2011 23:31:00 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1300 Forrest J. Ackerman, Creator of “Famous Monsters of Filmland”

]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/14/geek-of-the-day-forrie/feed/ 0 Lyrics of the day: Glucose House http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/14/lyrics-of-the-day-glucose-house/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/14/lyrics-of-the-day-glucose-house/#comments Thu, 14 Apr 2011 23:27:19 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1298 “Sugar Shack”

Standing on the edge of the cliff, I start to slip.
Don’t mind if I slide off.
Now I feel my mood start to lift, I find my grip and the screaming fades away below.
I grab myself and spin me around I start to sprint.
I climb down to steadier ground.
If I can bushwhack it on back to the shack behind those hills I’ll find the world is finally still.

Run through pale dark woods to that Sugar Shack
Breathe warm steam and hide in that old Sugar Shack.

Boiling heat, maple steam frozen snow then it flows.
When you leave, maple trees wait till spring to go again.

A mosaic of lies I tried to arrange in ways that shelter the blame.
I though I might have made off clear with all of the loot.
I plucked and ate all the fruit.
Then I started hearing the yells and shattering plates drowned out by your slithering stares.
I was followed and chased and caught and tied up by the hay right until I made my escape.

Run through pale dark woods to that Sugar Shack
Breathe warm steam and hide in that old Sugar Shack.

- Mike Gordon (Phish)

]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/14/lyrics-of-the-day-glucose-house/feed/ 0 Geek of the Day: The Dreamer http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/11/geek-of-the-day-the-dreamer/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/11/geek-of-the-day-the-dreamer/#comments Mon, 11 Apr 2011 08:35:02 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1286

Jim Henson, creator of the Muppets

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]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/09/comedy-sketch-of-the-day-hello-dave/feed/ 0 Lyrics of the day: She’s the one for me http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/08/lyrics-of-the-day-shes-the-one-for-me/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/08/lyrics-of-the-day-shes-the-one-for-me/#comments Fri, 08 Apr 2011 15:25:47 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1272 My reflection, dirty mirror
There’s no connection to myself
I’m your lover, I’m your zero
I’m the face in your dreams of glass
So save your prayers
For when we’re really gonna need’em
Throw out your cares and fly
Wanna go for a ride?

She’s the one for me
She’s all I really need
Cause she’s the one for me
Emptiness is loneliness, and loneliness is cleanliness
And cleanliness is godliness, and god is empty just like me – Smashing Pumpkins

]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/08/lyrics-of-the-day-shes-the-one-for-me/feed/ 0 Parting Thought: 4/7/2011 http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/08/parting-thought-472011/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/08/parting-thought-472011/#comments Fri, 08 Apr 2011 08:41:24 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1267 I’ll leave you with this parting thought: In Pacman… just who’s ghosts WERE those?

 

My prediction: Dead Pacmen. There can be only one.

 

]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/08/parting-thought-472011/feed/ 0 Make this Movie: A Burgertime To Kill http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/07/make-this-movie-a-burgertime-to-kill/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/07/make-this-movie-a-burgertime-to-kill/#comments Fri, 08 Apr 2011 04:52:09 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1259 “Yes they deserve to fry and I hope they taste delicious as hell!


]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/07/make-this-movie-a-burgertime-to-kill/feed/ 0 Listen to this: The Dirty View http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/07/listen-to-this-the-dirty-view/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/07/listen-to-this-the-dirty-view/#comments Thu, 07 Apr 2011 21:58:54 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1251 A few weeks back, the SmodCastle and myself was graced yet again by the awesome presence of  Amanda Fucking Palmer, who alongisde Kim Airs and Kirsten Vangsness, and in support of Planned Parenthood put on a podcast one could only describe as the “Dirty View”. It’s fucking hilarious, and your donation goes to a great cause. Peep it at Amanda’s website.

 

]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/07/listen-to-this-the-dirty-view/feed/ 0 What I’m watching: Mother Russia http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/04/what-im-watching-mother-russia/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/04/what-im-watching-mother-russia/#comments Tue, 05 Apr 2011 05:11:57 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1232

]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/04/04/what-im-watching-mother-russia/feed/ 0 Lyrics of the Day: Esther http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/03/30/lyrics-of-the-day-esther/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/03/30/lyrics-of-the-day-esther/#comments Thu, 31 Mar 2011 05:04:21 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1227 It was late one fall night at a fairground near town
When Esther first saw the Armenian man
Who groveled toward her and stood by her side
With a bucket that swung in his hand

His grin stretched the folds of his pasty white cheeks
And his lips hurled a dollop of murk on the curb
And the lights from the rides showed a mischievous sparkle
That flashed in his hollow eyed stare

He said “Little girl, you can chop off my legs
And then peel off my socks if you want to.
But I’d rather you took this old puppet from me
That I hold in my pail as we speak.”- Anastasio/Marshall (Phish)

]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/03/30/lyrics-of-the-day-esther/feed/ 0 Comedy Sketch of the Day: Brain Stew, Jack! http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/03/30/comedy-sketch-of-the-day-brain-stew-jack/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/03/30/comedy-sketch-of-the-day-brain-stew-jack/#comments Thu, 31 Mar 2011 04:58:27 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1225

]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/03/30/comedy-sketch-of-the-day-brain-stew-jack/feed/ 0 Camel Chat: 3/28/2011 “Tone that shit down” http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/03/28/camel-chat-3282011-tone-that-shit-down/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/03/28/camel-chat-3282011-tone-that-shit-down/#comments Tue, 29 Mar 2011 06:05:11 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1206

]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/03/28/camel-chat-3282011-tone-that-shit-down/feed/ 0 Aesthetic of the Evening: Whitechapel http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/03/28/aesthetic-of-the-evening-whitechapel/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/03/28/aesthetic-of-the-evening-whitechapel/#comments Tue, 29 Mar 2011 02:44:02 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1202

]]> http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2011/03/28/aesthetic-of-the-evening-whitechapel/feed/ 0 Pop Sickles #1 (pilot) http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2010/12/12/pop-sickles-1-pilot/ http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/2010/12/12/pop-sickles-1-pilot/#comments Mon, 13 Dec 2010 07:09:00 +0000 Matt http://www.cameltoadproductions.com/?p=1038 Check it out and let us know what you think-

POP SICKLES #1 (Pilot) by mattcohennyc

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